I have no self control when it comes to snacks. If you give me a giant bag of chips, I will sit there and stuff my face until the bag is empty. I don’t eat it all out of hunger, I just can’t stop shoving food into my mouth when
poop
Ice Cream Curse
I got over my inability to eat ice cream pretty quickly. Even though I am lactose intolerant, I decided eating ice cream was a good idea because 1) it is delicious, and 2) it gives me hellacious gas worthy of dutch-oven’ing my fiancé. My farts that night were super hellacious.
Chocolate Surprise
Update from March 27: I didn’t poop in a bag. I was able to hold in my turd up until the last second that the construction guys finished. They left, and I made my deposit in the porcelain dropbox. It didn’t feel like I had a lot to release, but
