I went on vacation for the last two weeks. When I travel, I usually get a mild form of travel constipation. This time it was severe. I didn’t poop for an entire week. I had zero bowel movements and zero urges to poop. This made my beach vacation a nightmare because my belly swelled up like I was 5 months pregnant from all the poop stored in my intestines. I was eating all sorts of things to give myself any bowel movements, but it was probably all the steaks and meats I was consuming that plugged up my bunghole. Finally on day seven, I went to McDonald’s for an after dinner snack. On day seven at 10:30pm, I clogged the toilet. Thank you, Mickey D’s!